Battle Preparation

Taking a little divergence from my planning posts to write about something controversial.  This is something that is weighing so heavily on my heart and mind that I don't have much mental energy for anything else.  I posed the question, "How do we prepare our children for the battle?" at the MODGFamilies Yahoo group, so if you are part of that group this might sound familiar.   I feel like this issue warrants a blog post, though I'm not sure I will be able to address it properly.  Please bare with me.

This whole question arose when, in choosing a speaker to give the commencement address at the high school my son attends, the faculty chose an openly gay man.  This man had recently posted on face book, or maybe YouTube, that he was engaged to another man.  Because of his openly gay stance, the principal decided to uninvite him to speak.  As you can imagine, this caused quite a problem for the man invited to speak, his family, and the faculty at the school.  I wont go into detail but suffice it to say things were a mess.  After four years at this high school I was so happy Night Owl was graduating.  I knew things weren't perfect there.  The Religion classes weren't always the best, but there was nothing said or taught that we weren't able to discuss at home, and bring the Church's truth and clarity to. 

What I didn't realize, is that there was a prevailing attitude of relativism which had affected my son to some degree, and for many of the students at the school to a large degree.  I don't think "relativism" was actually taught as in , "all is relative".  But there was that underlying attitude of relativism that seeped its way into the school.  I'm picturing it as a vile green smoke, that nobody seems to notice.  No one sees it and it has no smell, but its affects are damaging like a poison.

So we set the stage with relativism, and we throw in the fact that there is very little solid Catholic doctrine being taught.  Now we have a shaky foundation on the building into which this green mist seeps. Finally, when the seniors at the school are just about to graduate an issue like this comes up.

The teachers and students are angry at the principal who eventually blames everything on the Bishop.  The students are in a frenzy.  They all rally for the speaker.  They make t-shirts in one of their classes, they make a "students against homophobia" video in another, they are given permission to call an assembly... What a frenzy!  Everyone supports the speaker, but no one, no one, uses this as an opportunity to teach the students what the Church teaches.  There are letters to the editor about how the Catholic Church teaches hate and fear.  There are letters about bullying.  Anyone who tries to speak out for the truth is considered a hateful homophobic.  My son, and many others are confused. 

In all his life I never thought I would have to prepare him for this.  We studied the Catechism, we studied the saints, we studied the Bible.  I never thought to talk to him about how this issue would present itself in so much confusion that it would be hard to know what is right and what is wrong.  The faculty member who was involved in choosing this speaker spoke of how they teach tolerance at the school.  We did not know that going in.  We would have made different choices.  I am not a theologian but I do believe that tolerance is not a Catholic teaching.  I believe that LOVE is a Catholic teaching and sometimes love is hard.  Love tells us to love the person and help the person, not continue to enable him to live in a way that displeases God and will never make him happy.  I love this quote by Fulton Sheen regarding tolerance (mentioned at MODGfamilies)  ~

"There is no other subject on which the average mind is so much confused as the
subject of tolerance and intolerance...
Tolerance applies only to persons, but never to principles.
Intolerance applies only to principles, but never to persons."

             Fulton J. Sheen 1931
             The Curse of Broadmindedness

As my son graduates, I am relieved that this ordeal is over for him.  I am even more relieved that he is back on track and all is well in his heart and soul.  But I'm not willing to let it go.  In speaking with a friend recently I was so tired of it all I said I was done and we're moving on.  But I notice I can't just move on.  The fact is, there are so many children at the school who have been affected by this mess.  How are they moving on?  Is it no big deal, "live and let live"?  Are some choosing to act as though it never happened?  Have some become militant in the campaign for gay rights?  I don't know.  I do know that I need to keep praying.  I need to discern mightily - will any of my other children go to this high school?  If so, how will I prepare them differently?  If not, I have to realize this issue and others like it will come up in their lives no matter where they are.  How do I prepare them for that?  I don't know yet.  I am praying for wisdom because I feel at this point that is all I can do.  And then that nagging question... "Should I be doing more than just praying?  Should I be in that school, in some way, to shine the light of Christ?  Is there some way that I can dispel some of that green mist to bring the clarity of truth?"  I need to pray for courage if that is the case, but I am surely lacking in it!

I would like to end with a quote by a priest who is the pastor at another Catholic Church in our town.  His homily a couple of Sundays ago was in response to the mess at the Parish in which we are members.  His entire homily was beautiful.  A very loving, compassionate explanation of the Church's teaching.  I wished I had a tape recorder with me that day because I knew I would not be able to remember it all.  He did send this short quote to me when I requested it, for which I am grateful.  It is very pointed and a great explanation for all who don't understand why the Church does not accept the homosexual lifestyle~

The key is the complementarity of men and women. Sexual complementarity has to do with God making the human person as male and female, and they are meant for union. This union is a bodily reality as well as a spiritual, emotional, and psychological reality. Only a man and a woman can enter into a bodily union in the natural way. The bodily union is sacramental for Christians as it is meant to express a union with God and a union that images God’s love in the world that is total and complete (bodily), forever (unending), and open to life (conception of new life) if they are of the proper age. Only a man and a woman can give and receive each other in this embrace in a total way (bodily, psychologically, emotionally, spiritually). Our bodies are important.  Our bodies do matter and what we do in our bodies will have lasting effects on our hearts.

In closing I ask for prayers. I know this is a controversial topic and I also ask that all comments would be made in a prayerful way.  I reserve the right to delete comments that I feel are aggressive.

PJ's Baptism

Sunday turned out to be a beautiful day.  My brother and his wife, PJ's godparents, came up with their kids, and my mom and her husband came as well.  It was nice to see them all and my kids really enjoyed re-connecting with their cousins! 
The baptism itself was beautiful and I was proud that my children behaved at Mass!  I have these fears of one of them diving into the baptismal pool (I apologize that I don't know the official name for it) but other than a close call with Beany, nothing of the sort happened!
After the baptism family and friends all came to the house to help us celebrate.  It was a joyful event!

 PJ with his godmother after the "de-robing"!  He looks a bit stricken by the whole event!

PJ with his godparents.

The cousins got to bring up the gifts!

The kids all behaved well ... mostly!

We are so blessed with little PJ!

Grandpa, and Grandma with grandchild #19!

Saints, simplified

With All Saints Day coming up the kids are excited and talking on a regular basis of who they are going to "be".  I have to admit, I find this all rather stressful.  I think it has to do with the costumes.  Or actually, making the costumes. Anyone who knows me knows that I am not crafty and sewing is something I've never found relaxing.  Social Butterfly, on the other hand, must be blessed with some genes from her Mom Mom!  But, this post isn't about sewing, it's about the saints.

We love to read about the saints here.  Each day that there is a feast, my kids want to hear the story of that particular saint. But sometimes, like All Saints Day costumes, it can get to be "too much".  Doing a search on line for a particular saint will bring up all sorts of recipes and crafts to do.  It's easy to get caught up in it all and think, in order to remember a particular saint, this that and the other thing need to be done.  I recently read a blog post here that addresses this very thing.  My kids love the crafts and the special foods, and sometimes we do add those things to our day, but, as the blogger above says, it's really about the story.

So that's what I've concentrated on this year.  We have done absolutely no crafts for any of the saints we have studied and, true confession time, I haven't even prepared a special food for any of the saint's feast days.  I'm not saying it's best, I'm just saying it's what is happening here.  Instead we just read the story, talk about how we can imitate that saint and move on.  If I have a picture or statue, we put it on our window sill to remind us of the day.  It's working out fine.  I just finally came to the realization that for us, remembering a saint on this more ... "normal" level means we are more likely to get to it.  When I keep things simple, we actually do read about each and every saint and talk about them.  When I think I need to make a special cake or buy ingredients for a special craft in order to honor a saint, it often just doesn't get done.  When I know  that during prayer time today we are simply going to read about that saint it happens every time.

I thought I would mention a few resources that I use on a regular basis for reading about the saints.  There are many, many books and web sites about saints and if I wanted to list all that I know about it would take pages and pages.  But these are my "go to" resources, the ones we use all the time. 

Catholic Mosaic - I love this book.  The author, Cay Gibson, is a homeschool mom who compiled a list of beloved saints and found picture books for each.  I have slowly collected most of these picture books and my children enjoy hearing them read each year on the saint's particular feast day.  She also gives suggestions for crafts, copywork, and much more.  As I said above though, this year we are just concentrating on the story and it's working great.
Fenestrae Fidei - This is the companion coloring book for Catholic Mosaic.  It's easy for me to include the coloring pages because I will let the kids color while I read.  This is a great activity for fidgety kids.  Another resource for coloring pages is the Waltzing Matilda Blog where the talented author has many saints coloring pages available.


Picture Book of Saints  We use this book on a regular basis.  It is part of our morning prayer routine.  Whenever it is a feast day, we look here first to find the story of the saint.  It is written for children, with short paragraphs but it gives great information.  Actually, my kids will read through this book at random times during the year.  It's always with our morning prayer resources so they know where to go to get it.  For my older children it will often inspire them to learn more about the saints.  This time of year it is particularly useful, because of the pictures, for putting together costumes for All Saints Day celebrations.

Catholic Culture Liturgical Year If I can't find information about a particular saint in the resources above, or when the kids want to learn more about a saint, we go to this great web site.  In years past, when I had more energy for crafts and recipes, this site was used often for ideas. 

Along with remembering the saints on their feast days, my children are also reading about a particular saint on a regular basis.  This is part of their school work.  For this purpose, the younger kids (K - 2nd grade) use one of these books:
Once Upon a Time Saints and More Once Upon a Time Saints  The stories are relatively short and I read them to the children.  Afterwards, the kids do a narration of what they have learned and usually draw a picture.  The neat thing about these books is that many of the saints in them aren't commonly known.  Did you know there was a Saint Kentigern, or a Saint Pharaildis?

Vision Books of the saints  These are the books the older kids use.  They read them to learn more about the entire life of the saint.  I will occasionally read one of these biographies to the kids as part of our Tea Time reading.

So now I'm off to find the makings for our various costumes this year.  Builder wants to be St. Sebastian, arrows and all. 

This is going to be tricky!

Jetter's First Communion

Another very special day for Jetter!  On Saturday, April 24th, he received his First Holy Communion.  He was so excited, and nervous about this big event.
God bless you Jetter!  We are very proud of you!

Of course, not everyone was quite so excited!

A Big Day for Jetter

Tuesday evening Jetter was Confirmed.  The Bishop came and did Confirmations for the area churches.  It was a huge crowd.  Jetter was so nervous at first, but relaxed once the ceremony started.  We are so proud of the fine young man he is growing up to be!

Next step, First Communion on the 24th!

Workbox activity for Lent

Here's a great workbox activity for Lent!  The children will make a Stations of the Cross booklet.  I recently discovered  That Resource Site and I've been spending lots of time there, finding some great activities for the kids.

As we've been praying the stations this Lent, I have our pictures hanging form our mantel.  The pictures are from CHC .  Social Butterfly and I found some glass votive candle holders at JoAnn Fabrics  and they are working beautifully.  The children are much more reverent during prayer when the candles are lit - even Beany!

Solemnity of Saint Joseph

Go here for a beautiful prayer to Saint Joseph on this special feast day!